Thursday, March 01, 2007

Drama is over...Cruise is off....

Don't know if I blogged about going on a cruise or not but my parents were planning a 50th wedding anniversary cruise for the whole family and I mean whole family, kids, grandkids, husbands and wives, boyfriends and girlfriends, were supposed to go but unfortunately it had to be cancelled because of a lot of reasons. The main reason is financial, but there are a lot of things going on with disfunctionally family. There were a lot of issues about this cruise even from the beginning. So it is probably for the best that it was cancelled.

We, as a family are not a close group. I don't know if this happened on purpose, but we are very busy people. My brother has 2 grown girls from his first marriage and 4 boys from his second marriage and I have three children, so to say we are busy is an understatement. Our jobs have brought us in different directions so all of this is the reality of our life as a family. The only communication that we have on a regular basis is a Christmas card with a letter of what happened over the year.

You can't pick your family but sometimes it would be better if we could. It is hard when things are done in the family that aren't fair. I try to explain to my children that life isn't fair but one would hope that family would try to be fair and treat everyone equally. I really try to do that with my children. I know it doesn't always happen but I make up for it in other ways. This is not true with others in this family. Some are lifted higher than others and it is hard to explain why? How do you tell your children why someone in their family doesn't that? It was hard to explain when they were little but now that they are older they understand. You would think that family would take off the blinders and see this and try to correct it or see the hurt in the other children but this has not happened. But now that the children are older this family seems to think that they should drop everything to accommodate them. My children learn from example and the example that was set by this family to my children was that we don't have time for you. But we do have time for certain others. You would think that as adults they would know better. I know I am rambling on about this but it has been eating away at me for such a long time.

This was taken from an other family members blog as it it describe by them: You can't be a family if there is no contact or communications. You can't expect everyone to get together for any amount of time if there is no type of foundation. When you see one person in the family lifted higher than others it causes hurt feelings. You want to blame the person who is being treated so much better than the others. But the blame doesn't solely placed on this one person. He or she should stand on their own two feet and be an adult. Share the affections with other members of the family. The other party should look at their actions and figure out why the family doesn't want to spend time with them. You have to be in your whole family lives. You can't pick your family but you have to love them. Just remember that there are all kinds of special events and they all need the family to acknowledge them. Not one more person, than no one else. No Matter how far they live or how young or old they are. You can't pick and choose who you do more for. They should be treated equal.

So I end this with I doubt that things will ever change and at this stage in our lives even if it does it's probably too late.

No comments: